This is sooo me!

Genèvieve took the Which color is your aura? quiz and the result is Blue

Blues are the most caring, nurturing and protective personalities in the color-spectrum. They live out of their hearts and their emotions. Their life purpose is to serve, help and love others. Blues have an inner knowledge and wisdom and they feel and know what is right without needing facts or data for substantiation. The moment they become quiet inside, they will recognize or hear an inner voice or guidance, which will tell them what to do. They can easily tune into other people and feel precisely what is going on. Blues are the most emotional of all the color personalities. They often feel lost if they don't have the opportunity to clear their way through their intense jungle of deep feelings. Helpful activities for Blues would include talking with friends about their inner life, writing a journal or just being quiet so their intense emotions can calm down.

This describes me almost perfectly!! I was really shocked and wanted to share! =D

Jobs and Money

well.... I've got two interviews this week. One today at 11:30a and one tomorrow between 12-2p. The one today is from an ad in the paper for a job that I really don't know what it is but they said there aren't any qualifications and they pay for training so we'll have to see...The other job is with an old employer that I had a couple years ago doing security. They're supposed to have something available for F/T or at least over 20 hours. If thats true and I don't get the other job, then it'll be worth having the second job. One I won't like too much but will give decent pay and the job I have at Gamestop which I love and can enjoy going to when I DO work. So hopefully something works out because I really need to be able to pay for childcare, especially with school coming up...

My baby

So earlier tonight I talked to my daughter's paternal grandmother (Deb) and we talked for almost 2 hours. She was catching me up on a lot of different things that are happening with my daughter. Like: Potty training, what she's been up to lately, that she's now into that stage of always asking "why?", little moments that have made Deb crack up laughing..things like that. During our conversation I in turn was talking to her about a few things myself, like what's been going on with my situation (a little vague at times though), how colton's been doing and what he's started learning recently, about some rumors that I've heard and if there are any truths to them, asking her why it seems nobody has anything to with him, and at one point breaking down when I was talking about how much I miss my little girl and how it breaks my heart every time I see new pictures of her or hear her voice...that's one of the reasons I don't call more often. Every time I call to see how she's doing and hear her voice, I spend hours trying to disconnect myself so I don't get depressed again.

I had heard that her father was saying things like, I don't care about her and don't wanna have her in my life or else I'd be around more or call more....I don't know if that's true but I do know that I fought all last year to try and keep her with me...I failed in the end and got one of the worse possible outcomes...all because of a stupid law that shouldn't even exist. His family took my daughter away from me...I went through hell last year all while being pregnant and ending up practically homeless and I still only ended up seeing her for 6 1/2 weeks in a period of 8 months (which I had to fight even for that!! They only wanted her to be with me for no more than 4!) How would they feel if their child was taken away from them because they happened to be struggling financially and wanted to move to a place where they could give their children a better life but the other family "loved that child like their own" and didn't want the child to leave? Being torn between needing to leave because I was practically homeless and also needing to stay because otherwise it would be labeled "abandonment"....and I still lost her in the end.

Now I move back here so I can have her back, and I can't because I have no money coming in thanks to the economy and all the job hours being cut right now...then getting denied cash assistance in the meantime because I did not get my phone calls returned at the social services office...so I have no money to get the things I would need to enforce the custody order. I love my daughter so much and it's killing me everyday not having her with me. Michael tells me that I shouldn't worry, that it'll happen. What I'm afraid of is too much time going by and them fighting to take her away from me for good and/or helping Matt to get full custody now that he's living with them again. I'm afraid that if I don't get her with me soon that I'm going to lose her completely.

I lost my daughter, not because I'm unfit as a mother, but because I've struggled financially to support her on my own without her father's help....Then having the people that I slightly trusted use every time they've ever offered to help me out (because I had no family around to do so) against me to take my daughter from me...I won't ever underestimate them or that family ever again. They've already proven that they can manipulate a situation in their favor.

What they did was wrong. No parent should have their child taken away from them that has been good, has worked their butt off to make sure their child had things they needed, been there for their child's life and shown to be a hardworking, loving, caring parent... I've done the best with what I have had. I thought they were trying to help me make sure she was loved and cared for....never did I think that they would latch onto her so much that they would fight to take her away from me just because they love her so much.

They are NOT her parents! They will be dead in the next few years for crying out loud! They're in their 80's, lived their lives, raised their own children....why in the hell do they feel justified to take away my daughter!!!!

My 2nd day of work

Today was a pretty good day I think. Michael woke me up very nicely when he came home. I missed him a lot last night and have been a little irritated the last couple days with him so when he surprised me with soft kisses to wake me up this morning, I thought it was really sweet.
I went to work today. My second day in...a month..grrrr..oh well. Not much I can do there. I really do love going to work though. It's a lot of fun. One of the best places I've worked at in a REALLY long time. The co-workers that I've met so far I really like too so that helps.
When work was over, Bon dropped Colton and I off back at home. I put him down for a nap then got something small to eat since I hadn't eaten since morning. Then after I had some food in my stomach, I started making dinner for Michael and I. I made baked BBQ chicken with pasta and stuffing. It was really good =) While we ate, Michael and I watched an episode of Legend of the Seeker online. I love being able to sit close to him, arm entwined in his, holding his hand, laying my head on his shoulder when I get the urge to...
It was a really good end to a good day...or so I thought was the end, lol. After Michael left for work I got to talk to my big sis Michille =D Happy Gen!!! lmao..That helped make my day even better! =) Now I'm just relaxing and listening to music while I write this then it's off to bed...Have a wonderful night everyone!